Metaphorically Speaking

Buoyed by the promise of endless and contradictory metaphors from Owen at Boots and Sabers, Glenn Grothman today donned his body armor and walked out of his office ready to do battle with the forces of common sense. The first victim was a little old lady. She approached him to ask a question and a withering crossfire mowed her down.

The Grothman campaign later issued a press release regarding the incident and blamed her death on "... The forces of liberalism against which we issue forth from our citadel of righteousness, with cannon blazing, aircraft strafing, UFOs raining phasor blasts and with any other romantic or applicable metaphors applied as we see fit. If that fails, there's always Kevin Barrett."

UPDATE: Nevermind.