Sunday, July 27, 2008

Conservative Bloggers Chased from Bradford Beach

MILWAUKEE, July 4 (UPI) -- Milwaukee parks officials have hired a team of average middle class African-Americans to keep conservative bloggers away from Bradford Beach.

The Milwaukee County Parks Department said teams of two of the average middle class African-Americans will patrol the beach for eight hours every day looking for white-skinned, basement-dwelling conservative bloggers whose only purpose in life has been identified as spreading innuendo and disrupting relations between the many good people of Milwaukee.

The addition of the African-Americans is not entirely devoid of benefit to the conservative bloggers. Once the African-Americans (especially the children) focus on their usually obese targets, these same targets run as fast as their chubby legs can carry them, thereby producing a [for them] strange activity called exercise. Some conservatives have actually admitted that exercise felt good and they were tempted to try more exercise, albeit using more traditional methods such as workouts, walks and actually getting to know people unlike themselves.

“The beach had such a challenge with the conservative bloggers," Parks Director Sue Black said. "They were constantly yelling “Thug” and "Negro" in whiny, squeaky voices while pointing trembling fingers at every single African-American they saw. It was embarrassing. It was as though this was their first visit to a big city.”

The program, which began as an experiment two weeks ago, is overseen by Migratory Conservative Blogger Management. Katie Gramoll, a field operations manager for the group, said average middle class African-Americans are perfect for the job because the conservative bloggers immediately sense danger when darker skinned persons approach. “It's a weird reverse predatory action similar to what wolves and coyotes and foxes do when they're stalking their prey," Gramoll said. "It's why they're so effective at dispersing these bloggers, though the reaction of the bloggers really makes no sense."


Satire. Susan Black and Katie Gramoll are real persons, but the quotes attributed to them are not real. This satirical piece was based on an article written in the Journal Sentinel July 3, 2008 by Alex Lundy.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

The Voice of Conservatism

Slightly to the right of mainstream conservatism, blowhard Michael Savage recently said this about autistic children.
Autism -- everybody has an illness. If I behaved like a fool, my father called me a fool. And he said to me, "Don't behave like a fool." The worst thing he said -- "Don't behave like a fool. Don't be anybody's dummy. Don't sound like an idiot. Don't act like a girl. Don't cry." That's what I was raised with. That's what you should raise your children with. Stop with the sensitivity training. You're turning your son into a girl, and you're turning your nation into a nation of losers and beaten men. That's why we have the politicians we have.
One would think that Savage would find a way to apologize for his heinious and inaccurate comments, especially after being bombarded with complaints from families with autistic children. But in true conservative fashion, Savage instead attacked.

The autism controversy is very important because true autism is extremely heartbreaking. I have devoted my entire life, even as a child, to defending the helpless, mainly the helpless children because of a tragedy in my own family, and it's ironic that people who hate families and children -- a group called Media Matters, filled with anti-family individuals who do not marry; they're men who like men -- would take out of context comments that I made last week directed at the misdiagnosed, the falsely diagnosed, and the outright fakers in the autism field and try to make you, the parents of the truly autistic, attack me.
You know that's what beats at the center of most conservatives, a hatred for those it doesn't understand, A hatred for those different; from characterizing black voters as thugs, to denying a sizable portion of the population the opportunity to marry like anyone else.

Don't be fooled by those who say he does not speak for conservatism. He is their voice. It's just convenient to hide behide his rhetoric and let him take the heat. If conservatives truly thought so little of him, they, too, would be appalled and join with the rest of decent society in having him removed from the airwaves. It's not censorship; he truly is the person yelling fire in a crowded theater.

It's Educationable, D'oh.

No wonder so many conservative bloggers show such little concern about their spelling; and they blame the teachers' union. Ha!


h/t This Modern World



Monday, July 21, 2008

Were They Thugs?

It's not a big leap from calling them names like thug.


Ain't It the Truth

I don't usually comment about sports in this blog. However, my in-laws sent me this picture and I thought it warranted a post.

Could also be used to describe reactions of conservative bloggers, in general, to anything resembling criticism of any stance they take.


Sunday, July 20, 2008

How Smart Are You?

Click here and take the test. I got a 28 ... so I guess I'm an above average clicker.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Friday, July 18, 2008

Personality Cult

As Glenn Greenwald explains it, the Attorney General does not work for the president of the United States. The Attorney General's interests must first and foremost be those of the citizens of the United States. And yet, we have a former AG (Gonzalez) referring to Bush as his client, and having it explained that the current AG believes that is the correct relationship, too. We also have a White House staffer who believes that an oath she read when she went to the White House was to the president.

Very sad ... and frightening.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Better Late Than Never, I Suppose

Sometimes one cannot improve on what is written. Jonathon Schwarz, posting at This Modern World, is spot on with this observation.

Jimmy Carter delivered his so-called “malaise” speech 29 years ago today. What we wouldn’t give today to have done what he advocated (except perhaps the expanded use of coal):


CARTER: Point one: I am tonight setting a clear goal for the energy policy of the United States. Beginning this moment, this nation will never use more foreign oil than we did in 1977 — never…

Point two: To ensure that we meet these targets, I will use my presidential authority to set import quotas…

Point three: To give us energy security, I am asking for the most massive peacetime commitment of funds and resources in our nation’s history to develop America’s own alternative sources of fuel…

I will soon submit legislation to Congress calling for the creation of this nation’s first solar bank, which will help us achieve the crucial goal of 20 percent of our energy coming from solar power by the year 2000.

These efforts will cost money, a lot of money, and that is why Congress must enact the windfall profits tax without delay…

Point four: I’m asking Congress to mandate, to require as a matter of law, that our nation’s utility companies cut their massive use of oil by 50 percent within the next decade and switch to other fuels, especially coal, our most abundant energy source…

Point five: To make absolutely certain that nothing stands in the way of achieving these goals, I will urge Congress to create an energy mobilization board…

Point six: I’m proposing a bold conservation program to involve every state, county, and city and every average American in our energy battle. This effort will permit you to build conservation into your homes and your lives at a cost you can afford.

To further conserve energy, I’m proposing tonight an extra $10 billion over the next decade to strengthen our public transportation systems…

Our nation must be fair to the poorest among us, so we will increase aid to needy Americans to cope with rising energy prices. We often think of conservation only in terms of sacrifice. In fact, it is the most painless and immediate way of rebuilding our nation’s strength. Every gallon of oil each one of us saves is a new form of production. It gives us more freedom, more confidence, that much more control over our own lives…

I do not promise you that this struggle for freedom will be easy. I do not promise a quick way out of our nation’s problems, when the truth is that the only way out is an all-out effort. What I do promise you is that I will lead our fight, and I will enforce fairness in our struggle, and I will ensure honesty. And above all, I will act. We can manage the short-term shortages more effectively and we will, but there are no short-term solutions to our long-range problems. There is simply no way to avoid sacrifice.

Thanks, America’s crazy right wing. We couldn’t have ignored our most important problems for three decades and thereby made them much worse without you.

The next time you read or hear a conservative complain that liberals have no ideas, try not to barf. And remember, conservatives would rather sit on their fat asses rather than actually work or lift a hand that might benefit others as well as themselves.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Thuggery in Conservative Suburbia

How many blog posts do you think will be written by right-wingnuts now that Waukesha and Pewaukee, hotbeds of self-righteous conservative concern for “thugs” in Milwaukee, have been identified as havens for heroin use leading to the deaths by overdose of at least five young adults.

Heroin, cocaine, crack cocaine ... it doesn't matter who uses, white or black. Addiction will overcome whomever.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

You're a Funny Guy

I've not been very active in the blogging business of late. Rather, I've spent most of my diminished blogging time reading and commenting at some of the many fine local blogs. And there are quite a few. On the liberal side, folkbum's rambles and rants, Pundit Nation, The Happy Circumstance, Blogging Blue, Illusory Tenant, Waxing America, and The Brew City Brawler, to name a few. On the right side, Wigderson Library & Pub, The Dave Casper Experience, From Where I Sit and [even] dad29, despite his homocidal tendencies (misspelling intentional) are good reading. I also enjoy The Electric Commentary.

[Note: I missed a few. Sorry. It was late. You know who you are. It was unintentional.]

Every once in a while I wander over to another blogger who has the ability to be a good writer, but most of the time succumbs to being a mutt. I'm speaking of the author of the famous “chattering chihuahuas” line, Peter DiGaudio of Texas Hold'em Blogger fame.

I have read many of his posts (in the past, not of late) and have marveled, on rare occasion, at how succinct he wrote and how well he made his point. The unfortunate thing is I cannot remember a single one because most of his time is spent making crude not-so-funnies at the expense of others, mostly liberals. His excuse being they do it so neener neener.

And, when it comes to hypocrisy, DiGaudio is aces. He is absolutely the leader of the pack.

His latest mockery was a July 14th spiel about the hateful lefts' response to the death of Tony Snow. DiGaudio cherry-picked a number of comments from Daily Kos that were, let's say, unkind to Snow's passing. I thought they were, too.

My thoughts of the man in hindsight are few. I did not really pay attention to him. He was a spokesman for the Bush administration so he probably bent the truth at their behest on a number of occasions. The “I was only following orders” defense as been ruled insufficient. But I have also read that he handled his assignment with dignity and his illness with grace and that he was respected by his peers. So be it.

The comments at Daily Kos were uncalled for ... but truthfully, they were pretty lame compared to some of the trash I've seen. I mean come on. Yelling at a hapless family of Hispanics to speak English and calling them chattering chihuahuas to their face I guess does not compare to calling Snow a voice for profiteers. Oooh. That was ... well above the belt, about chest high.

There will always be some who go too far. That is unfortunately the nature of blogging these days. But DiGaudio is the master of the broad brush, so of course you know that all the left is guilty for the crimes of the few. It's idiotic. It's how DiGaudio thinks. What is most hypocritical are the yips of righteousness that issue from his keyboard. Here is what he writes:

Few if any references to Chappaquiddick, lines such as “Mary Jo Kopechne was unavailable for comment” were pulled out of respect. We avoided obvious remarks like “Such is the end result of too many three Chivas Regal lunches.” We even dropped the reference to The Swimmer in our coverage of it.
Pulled out of respect?

Avoided obvious remarks?

Dropped reference to the Swimmer?

DiGaudio notes that these references were missing from the expressions of sympathy for Kennedy. He provides no examples. However, I can just imagine local conservative bloggers going out of their way for the Senator, his family and liberals. It's touching. How fortunate that we have Peter DiGaudio to lead the way in class and decency.

Ted Kennedy better die soon so he and we can reap the beneficence of the saintly DiGaudio and his gang of do-gooders. In the meanwhile, it's bar the doors because the shit is gonna keep flying.

Give. Me. A. Break.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Prescient Headline?

Considering Republican support for the idea of conceal/carry and the legion of gun nuts that claim membership in the Goofy Old Party, this headline in the Journal Sentinel regarding John McCain's visit to Hudson, WI to address voters is either unfortunate, eery, or makes perfect sense ...

McCain targets women at Hudson campaign stop

I'm telling my wife to duck.

Friday, July 4, 2008

Knowing History Really Is Good

James T. Harris is spewing more idiocy. I know this because I read a post at dad29's site titled "Knowing History is Good." Daddio swallows Harris' tripe whole and provides a link. There Harris wrote:

Hey, did you know that Dr. King was a Republican? Honestly, I knew that his father was a Republican, heck every black person born before 1960 was a Republican, so why do we never see "Republican" and "Dr. Martin Luther King Jr." in the same sentence?
He concludes that [we] blacks were hoodwinked.

As dad29 is wont to gargle: "Unnnhhhhhgurglespitunnhh."

Did you know that Jesse Helms died today at the age of 86. If you're not familiar with the career of this race-baiting embarrassment to US politics, check out Wiki where you can find this tidbit of info:

Helms began his career in politics as an unofficial researcher for Willis Smith, a conservative Democratic lawyer and former president of the American Bar Association, who successfully ran for the U.S. Senate in 1950. Smith ran as a supporter of racial segregation. After the election, Senator Smith hired Helms to be his administrative assistant in Washington, D.C. In 1952, Helms worked on the presidential campaign of Senator Richard B. Russell, Jr., of Georgia, who was seeking the Democratic nomination. When Smith suddenly died in 1953, Helms left Washington and returned to Raleigh.
Helms was a Democrat. As I pointed out to daddio, MLK's parents may well have been Republican. I don't know. The reason was most likely because the Democratic Party had within its ranks Southern Democrats who were associated with racial segregation and were some of the worst race baiters. These were refugees from the Civil War, in which the victorious North was associated with the Republican Party of Abraham Lincoln (both partys being very different today).

With the passage of the Civil Rights Amendment, these Southern Democrats, in droves, moved to which party(?) ... why, the Republican Party, because in it was represented those ideals that Southern Democrats now found lacking in the more-inclusive Democratic party.

King may have been Republican. But I can state fairly certainly that would not have remained so if he had been inclined to state a preference.

Update: Some rewrite done, not to content.

I Should Have Brought My Camera

I spent the evening with my two children and the Mike Mathias family watching the (incredible) fireworks from Juneau Park, and thinking up new ways to hate America, its troops and conjure up more creative ways to raise taxes. Because, you know, that's all liberals want to do.

Actually, beyond laughing at the silliness and the inanity of conservative thought, we actually did spend some time thinking about what we like about our country. It's an incredibly beautiful land. An eclectic variety of nationalities are represented; it's truly still the great melting pot. And, we are very fortunate to live here at this time in history rather than, for example, Iraq.

America, a place where we don't have to worry about roadside bombs; just crazed conservatives with gun lust and poor sprelling and grammar skills. Happy birthday, America.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Captain Blowhard Strikes Again

With, again, sincere apologies to my inspiration and the genius of Tom Tomorrow.






Click on image to enlarge.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

The First Time

And while I'm at it, here is the song that Kelly and I picked for our wedding; the Johnny Cash cover of "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face" by Roberta Flack.

Illegal Smile

This is for Wiggy ....